In my dreams I’m on Jeopardy! and they’re asking questions only about my family. The host says, “Aunt Mimi,” and I buzz in. “Who is Rob’s wife?” “Correct.” “Aunts for a thousand.”
In the joke, “Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!” the chicken did intend to do so, but unfortunately met a car and crossed over to the “other” side.
My dad caught me smoking cigarettes and made me finish the whole pack. Then he caught me looking at his Playboys and made me masturbate to every single page.
