Hey bitches!
Why can’t I do my work? Nooooo, I have to procrastinate on Facebook. It’s ok because I SAY I’m procrastinating. This way you get to listen to me bitch about not having enough time even though I’m tagging you in a Facebook note every five seconds. But isn’t bitching what being friendsies is about?
My life is so hard right now. I don’t know how anybody has ever managed to simultaneously balance classes and a social life. I don’t even have time for my Guitar Hero group any more and I’m the secretary treasurer. I don’t know why I’m so stupid sometimes.
At least I have the bestest boyfriend in the whole wide world. He would do anything and everything for me. I love him so much. Did I mention that I have a boyfriend? Because if I didn’t mention that, here it is: I have a boyfriend. He is always giving me little surprises. Just last week he killed a drifter for me. Out of the blue. I went into his room and found him shaking and covered in blood. He’s so cute. Whenever he has a surprise for me he can’t contain his giddy joy. I asked him what he had done, and he blurted out that he “was pretty sure he killed a hobo”. When I asked him why he do this for me, he just growled that “I should stop asking questions I don’t really need the answers of”. Then he got that sexy, wild look in his eye. Now, a lady doesn’t kiss and tell, so we’ll just say that a knife wasn’t the only thing he thrusted that night, and homeless blood wasn’t the only thing gushing copiously!
AHHHHH! Chemistry is going to be the death of me! I don’t know how I’m going to maintain my A average. For those of you that don’t get A’s like me, you have to have an average in the 90’s. Right now my average is only 96!!! That means if I fail the final, I get a B!!!! What am I going to do?? I need to have a really good average otherwise my parents are going to kkiillll me! I love the ‘rents, but they’re so annoying sometimes. I’m a freakin’ adult already, but they won’t let me go to
I have a boyfriend!
I should go get some work done. I totally have this Calc test that’s going to kkkilll me. Some of you are in my class, so you know how hard it is. If I get an 80, I won’t have by far the best average in the class anymore, which would be totally lame. Anyway, I’m going to hang out with my boyfriend. The police should have given up by now.
Bye, bitches!
Labels: Alex Willen, Ali Wisch, Court Sullivan, David Nelson, Emmanuel Witzman, Kevin “That Asian Dude” Chang, Nathan Degraaf, Nick Gaudio, Paul Frank, Simonne Cullen, That Bald Dude, That Other Chick