In Which the Great Philosophers Discuss the Matter of Godzilla

1. On the Mystery of Godzilla

• “The most difficult thing in life is to know Godzilla.”
  –Thales
• “To be Godzilla is to be misunderstood.”
  –Ralph Waldo Emerson
• “Godzilla is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma.”
  –Winston Churchill

2. Speculation and Definition

• “The nature of Godzilla is a circle of which the center is everywhere and safety is nowhere.”
  –Empedocles
• “Godzilla in motion tends to remain in motion, while objects at rest are trampled.”
  –Isaac Newton
• “Godzilla is not an independent phenomenon, but the continuation of earthquakes by other means.”
  –Carl von Clausewitz

3. On Matters of Defense

• “He who wants peace must prepare for Godzilla.”
  –Claudius
• “To win one hundred victories in one hundred battles is not the acme of skill. To survive Godzilla's nuclear wrath is the acme of skill.”
  –Sun Tzu
• “I came. I saw Godzilla. I ran away.”
  –Julius Caesar

4. On Acceptance

• “We write our names in the sand, and then Godzilla stomps in and tramples them away.”
  –Augustus Caesar
• “Only the dead have seen the end of Godzilla.”
  –Plato
• “In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death, taxes, and Godzilla.”
  –Benjamin Franklin

5. Necessity

• “Godzilla is the measure of all things.”
  –Protagoras
• “Godzilla is not a problem to be solved, but a reality to be experienced.”
  –Soren Kierkegaard
• “We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of Godzilla.”
  –Immanuel Kant

6. The Wisdom of Godzilla

• “Godzilla does not hurry, yet everything is trampled.”
  –Lao-Tzu
• “If Godzilla tramples a city, and no one survives to hear it, does he make a sound?”
  –Zen koan (traditional)
• “Consider Godzilla of the kaiju, how he lives; he worries not, but merely rises from the sea; yet I say unto you, that even Goliath the mighty could not inspire such fear.”
  –Jesus Christ

7. Godzilla in the Arts

• “It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a Kaiju in possession of atomic breath, must be in want of a city upon which to use it.”
  –Jane Austen
• “When Godzilla saw the breadth of his devastation, he wept, for there were no more cities left to trample.”
  –Plutarch
• “A kaiju! A kaiju! My kingdom for a kaiju!”
  –William Shakespeare, Richard III

8. The Significance of Godzilla

• “Godzilla does not determine who is right—only who is left.”
  –Bertrand Russell
• “Godzilla, if he does not kill us, makes us stronger.”
  –Friedrich Nietzsche
• “You must be the Godzilla you wish to see in the world.”
  –Mahatma Gandhi (attributed)

9. Conclusion

• “I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was Godzilla or whether I am now Godzilla dreaming I am a man. But I hope it is the latter.”
  –Zhuangzi