Did you see that the Senate voted to make Daylight Saving Time permanent? Guess we’ll never have to lose an hour again! Hey, speaking of losing an hour, am I nuts or were we supposed to meet at 3:00?
Sent at 3:52
Is traffic really bad? Don’t text back if you’re driving! But also don’t text back if you haven’t started driving yet because a responsible person would have left hours ago!
Sent at 3:59
If you were one character from Lord of the Rings, who would you be? I’d be Gandalf because, like he says, “a wizard is never late,” lol. Do you think you could be Gandalf? For me?
Sent at 4:03
I’m worried about Josh. He was supposed to meet up with me at 3:00 and it’s already 4:30. Is he okay?
Sent at 4:31
Oops, sorry Josh! That text was supposed to go to your wife. I guess I just texted her because I know you’re such a great friend that you wouldn’t stand me up like this unless something was really wrong.
Sent at 4:32
WARNING: This is Allstate. Your coverage will lapse unless you can fix issue of LATE payment.
Haha! Just kidding. It’s Scott. But seriously, what’s up? Are you parking?
Sent at 4:45
Josh, it’s you from the future, texting from Scott’s phone. I don’t have time to explain, but you have to get to your planned hang with Scott right now or the super-intelligent dolphins will win. Hurry! And maybe text back with like, an ETA?
Sent at 5:00
Just read that being late can be a symptom of undiagnosed ADHD! Which is super interesting because I actually have diagnosed ADHD and I was five minutes early. Mental health, huh? Crazy.
Sent at 5:10
Baby, I know I promised to get home at 5:30 to watch the kids since you’re so tired from working at the pediatric oncology ward— literally saving children from a painful death every single day— but Josh is running kind of late and I’m worried because even though he does this a lot, I still believe the best of him.
Sent at 5:25
Oops again! Sorry, J-Dog, that one was supposed to go to my wife. Psyched to see you soon!
Sent at 5:26
FYI, had to change venues. Hang is no longer at Sloppy Johnny’s Barcade to day drink and goof off, now it’s going to be at my place and we’re going to watch Paw Patrol at a reasonable volume.
Sent at 6:00
Hey, if you’re not like, about to pull up, could you stop by the store and pick up some snacks? And everything on the grocery list I’m attaching to this text? I would have gone myself, it’s just that I’ve been waiting for you. Pumped to bro down!
Sent at 6:13
Hey, don’t worry about it! You’re not even that late. On a geological scale. Ha! Get it?
Sent at 6:20
Because geological eras are millions of years long.
Sent at 6:35
Hey, remember in college when we read Waiting for Godot? Just thinking about that.
Sent at 6:45
Sure, we can do your place instead. If you just woke up from a nap, I get that you don’t want to drive all groggy. On my way. ETA 9:36
Sent at 9:21
Okay, well, if that’s too early, when should I come over?
Sent at 9:30