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Here's what I know: we are good at preventing suicides. We just need people to call. So please, if you know of anyone who looks pathetic, give them our number!
I’m here because I also have a relationship with the public, outside of Bill Cosby the human, and I have to ask you all one question: We're still cool, right?
150 years of the expectation of delivering gifts to billions of children every year has turned Santa into a dick. Here's what he confessed to me.
Jessica was just a normal, everyday HR Rep with everything going for her: a nice place, a great boyfriend, and a good job. That is, until she woke up ALONE.
While you're sipping the sugary egg nectar known as "nog," take a moment to look down below your torso. What type of textile is trimming your thighs? Thought so.
Past Christmas parties by the house church had themes such as "Dinner" and "Watching Netflix," but this year the theme is... *drumroll* "Christmas"!
Ever since I can remember, the group has been Bruce Clifton, Bruce Cartwell, and me, Bruce Codneck. So when Jason Coates showed up senior year, I got suspicious.
My grandfather passed away recently, and it's been very hard on me. He taught me so much, like "righty tighty and lefty loosey."
Employing a more acceptable word like "neuter" would not alter the graphic significance of such a canine procedure, at least to any human male.
My dad cashed his F word chip in around my brothers and me with a salty, heartfelt "MOTHER FUCKER." All because he didn't know how to use a handsaw.
Drunk texting is apparently one of the habits of a millennial, according to the media. That is so not true of my Janie. When she is drunk she can never find her phone.
The mood is erotic, as an IKEA lap shines on the nightstand, the kids are at a sleepover, and "Now That’s What I Call Music 51" plays that one song you like.