Two Dead After Tsunami Death Toll Makes Headline Splash
The tsunami disaster is making waves all over the world. But who knew the AP could be responsible for spreading it's impact?
Comedy Writing
Daring Deer Had D.C. Subway For Lunch
A runaway deer is caught on videotape?! This special report features commentary from our very own Court (the deer) from 'Deer Court'!
Dutch Legalize Baby Killing Out of Legalization Boredom
Just when it seemed the Netherlands had almost run out of things to legalize, someone remembered it might be handy to kill babies too.
U.S. Study Finds ‘Best’ AIDS Cocktail
Forget everything you've ever heard about the pitfalls of HIV and embrace the millions of dollars poured into satisfying the infected!
2004 the Fourth-Hottest Year on Record, Sixth on CD
Ozone Entertainment Weekly ranks 2004 as the fourth-hottest ever. DJ's everywhere must be going crazy, really!
Monkeys Terrorize India Workers, Tourists, Then Slip Up on Banana Peel
Monkeys have taken over India and the only thing that can stop them is their own diet.
Thanksgiving Travel Rush Results in 753 Bids; Freshmen Excited
College students around the country will flock home for their Mom's farm-raised turkey, but some freshmen will be a little happier than others.
Bush Re-Raises Four More Years; Terrorists All In
Bush is back in the White House and the Middle East is ready for a re-match! Okay, let's see the flop!
Jackson Booked As Storytime Reader During Child Molestation Case
Every 10 years, the kids decide to take a stand against Michael. But they still requested he read to them during naptime recess.
Exploding Cell Phones to Users: “You’re Blowing Up, Dude”
And you thought blaring, top 40 ringtones were annoying. Try having your phone explode in your ear and then say 'I told you so.'
Bob Dylan Totally Nominated for Noble Peace Highs
Dylan's Nobel Peace Prize nomination in literature has sparked some debate, as well as a few bong hits over 'Mr. Tambourine Man.'
Ron Artest Dehydrated After Spitting Too Much Game
In a baffling attempt to go platinum as a rapper, Ron Artest got too tired to play basketball for a few games. Silly bling dreams.