The Five Types of Morning Coffee Crazies
A list of people you will find at the coffee preparation station and the best way to fuck with them for your own personal amusement.
Comedy Writing
Don’t Worry New Hampshire, You Still Blow in a Big Way
New Hampshire used to pride itself on its world record for the fastest wind gust ever recorded on Earth. That is, until Australia took the wind out of its sails.
The Top 5 Things I Don’t Understand About Men and Cars
Maybe it's the need for speed, the desire for attention, or just over-compensating for ridiculously tiny penises... whatever it is, I don't understand men and cars.
Are You There God? It’s Me, Andrei
I understand that you're busy and all, but I just thought you should know that this 'plan' of yours pretty much blows! Leave shit alone down here!
Roxxxy, The World’s First Lifeless Sex Robot
True Companion has developed the world's first sex robot, a life-size doll designed to engage you in conversation rather than lifelike movement. Uhh... sweet?
The Middle East Has a Huge Cock
On January 4th, 2010 the world's tallest building was opened in Dubai, otherwise known as We Want You to Think We Have a Huge Cock Land.
2010 Can Suck It
I'm not excited about 2010 at all; in fact, I’m rather disappointed with the progress of the human race in general. Still no flying cars? Really?
The Day Jesus Apparently Became a Pagan
A friendly game of Christmas questions at the church turns into an all-out war to win candy canes at any expense: even at the expense of Jesus himself.
Fuck The Little Drummer Boy, Pa Rum Pum Pum Pum
If you really listen to The Little Drummer Boy song carefully, it's merely about a poor kid playing a drum for baby Jesus, pa rum pum pum pum.
Top Ten Reasons to Panic About Putin
I'm going to admit this at my own risk: I am highly disturbed by Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin's bizarre acts of trying to prove his manliness.
You’re Not Just Paying for Lip Service
To get all offended that an artist lip syncs on stage is no different than walking out on David Copperfield because he isn't ACTUALLY magical.
Ladies, Stop Cutting Your Hair!
Ladies, I'm here to tell you one of a man's innermost secret thoughts whenever we see that you got your hair cut: we wish you didn't.