San Francisco Could Be a Great City, If It Weren’t for Their Baseball Team’s Mascot
Lou had the t-shirt cannon, we made hard eye contact, and then he shoots the cannon in the complete opposite direction.
Comedy Writing
Spiders Should Start Wearing Cute Little Hats
Picture a spider eating a child, but now it’s wearing a tasteful little beret. People will ask, “Wow is that spider French?”
My Kid Took Karate Lessons and Now I’m Scared of Him
He’s always asked me to watch his new “moves” even before karate classes, but now I can’t help but feel like this display is meant to assert dominance.
Apartment Rules That May or May Not Relate to the Recent Cult Activity
If you happen to hear chanting outside of quiet hours, please do not respond by screaming out, “You call that chanting? I’ll show you chanting!”
It’s Time to Unify Around a Single Candidate: Ted from Accounting
Even Ted’s charisma is middle of the road. He’s the type of candidate that you could get a beer with, but choose not to.
While “Saving the World” Is a Nice Hobby, Don’t You Think It’s Time to Consider Graduate School, Superman?
Aren’t you tired of people mistaking you for a bird or a plane? With some higher education, they could recognize you as a local community leader.
Never Be Forced to Talk to Your Family Again with Nextdoor’s New App, DownTheHall
Jimmy Silverman (Jimmy’s Room): Was anybody in my room the other night? I heard strange noises coming from my closet and it smelled like bad eggs.