Keeping Diplomacy Kosher
The key to peace in the Middle East could have been staring us in the face all along: Hooters waitresses. That's right, sex sells AND calms.
David Nelson was born without a torso, however, this disability has not kept him from attending University or from advancing the cause of internet hilarity. With a mostly useless degree, Dave was hired strictly for employment equity purposes, and he currently enjoys the nicest penthouse office in the Points in Case Tower. For a mere ten dollars, he will have his secretary send out a signed photo of himself, or if out of stock, of jazz legend Thelonius Monk.
The key to peace in the Middle East could have been staring us in the face all along: Hooters waitresses. That's right, sex sells AND calms.
When I’m not demonstrating outside the White House, you’ll probably find me at a San Francisco bathhouse wearing a pair of assless leather chaps.
Increasingly, sports stars are trying to sing and dance, and entertainers are trying to throw and catch. Spare us the misery.
When you're pretending your next meal could be your last, you suddenly find your tastes surprisingly close to those on death row.
No other sport can put your excitement on ice quite like curling. If you have the stones for it, you'll find that it's not just pucking around.
If your best college memories involve cafeteria food and philosophy, my condolences. Bullshitting and sexual discovery is par for the course.
What could be so terrifying about taking every single item you own and packing it in your mother-in-law's box? Wait, that came out wrong.
Starting a cult takes devoted followers and an outrageous formula. Observe how Scientologists successfully incorporated galactic tyrants.
Which treasured childhood memories could make the leap to perverted instruments of gratification? Try Play-Doh and Slinky's on for size.
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50 years from now, some of today's hottest jobs will already be perfected by robots. Is your career path a dead end?
When it comes to legalizing marijuana, governments are like PMS-ing women: there's no using logic to convince them to change their minds.