Second-Hand Smoking Leads to Second-Hand Coolness
As the semester comes to a close, I've learned some valuable lessons. I've learned who my real friends are (nobody) and who secretly hates me (everybody).
Comedy Writing
Changing Your Major for Dummies
Everyone has considered it, but few actually do it. Talk to your advisor and see if changing your major is right for you.
How Do You Like Your Proms?
Turn back your clocks a little bit and reminisce over the good and bad parts of your high school prom. Bad parts being lack of alcohol.
The Joys of Mortgaging Your Future
I don't want to sound sexist, but I just can't imagine myself going out with a girl who has a car. The whole balance of power would be skewed since I don't have a car.
Why Evictions Always Happen on Somebody’s Birthday
Complaining about me walking around in my room? Anne Frank made more noise than that, and I hear she turned out all right.
Generic All-Purpose College Study Guide
Preparing for an exam? Here's a one-size-fits-all approach guaranteed to put your mind at ease for any subject.
Measuring Coolness By the Size of One’s Backpack
Backpacks are getting bigger. I see people walking around campus with bags big enough to transport small children.
A College Birthday Experience
Put your party hats on, it's time to explore everything besides alcohol that make a birthday memorable, starting with the 'In Da Club Remix.'
Kommon Kollege Komplaints
Building names, textbook price fever, roommate whining and early classes. Not to mention grammatical errors. Everyone's guilty here.
The Recess Rundown
How do you spend those 30 minute downtimes in between classes? Common answers include napping, reading, shoplifting and masturbating.
Of Health and Hygiene
Have you ever wondered why everything is always dirty and everyone is always sick? Don't worry, there's nothing you can do about it.
Just Because We’re Neighbors Doesn’t Mean We’re Friends
If dorm room assignments are done randomly, how come there are some quiet floors, some party floors, some slutty floors, some dork floors, and some jock floors...