And I Looked, and Behold! A Pale McRib
A demon with the head of a hamburger and the sash of an alderman materialized in my backseat. Flaps of hormone-infused beef formed his accursed lips.
Comedy Writing
Word Problems for Pandemic Weddings
If Keith's dad had to pick between his son having pre-marital sex or spreading a dangerous virus to 80 loved ones, how quickly did he choose wedding?
Nick Carraway’s Summer in Margaritaville
All of West Tampa’s aristocrats, from Hulk Hogan to the purveyor of Oxyclean, would cavort around his twirling menagerie of slushie machines.
Other Nicknames You Can Call Me Besides Vinny “Chickenshit” DiLorenzo
Despite everything I do, the only thing anyone can remember is a rumor that I mistook chicken poop for Runts candy.