Earth-1

KC was born in Oregon, raised in the Dakotas, educated in Colorado, groomed in NYC, and now teaches in Seoul, South Korea. He misses sleeping until noon, drinking nightly, and getting shot down by college girls. He still gets shot down by college girls. Casey "KC" Freeman finished college a few years ago and he's still trying to incorporate the things he learned into his everyday life. So far, at the end of the workday not a single coworker can pack their bookbag faster than KC. At the beginning of his career at PIC he was gainfully employed as an editor at one of the worst magazines in existence, but has also worked as a bartender, day laborer, telemarketer, public relations rep, swim coach, bouncer, KFC cook, pizza delivery boy, lifeguard and trucker. Now he's an English teacher in South Korea. Life, work and the oddities in between inspire him to create things that enhance souls. Even though he's the greatest, he wants you to know that You're the Best.

Comedy Writing

The Brutal Run-In With Your Ex

Barry and Gina accidentally bump into each other at the mall after an awful breakup. Unfortunately, they're no longer loving or kind to each other. Here's their conversation.

Getting Older

<p>When you get older, you start having conversations like this. PJ and I celebrate our old-man birthdays about a month apart.</p><p>PJ: So this 21-year-old chick and I have been hitting it off.</p><p>KC: Ugh.</p><p>PJ: Excuse me? Did I mention she was 21? That's so awesome! </p><p>KC: Yes. It's going to lose its cool in about 21 minutes after you start talking with her.</p>

Halloween Headaches 2010

<p>Every Halloween I judge people and their costumes. This year I'm nine days late because it's taken that long for me to get over the Halloween beer, soju (Korean liquid death), and whiskey binge I encountered.</p>

Fire Eggs

<p><img src="/files/u46/fire_eggs.jpg" alt="" width="400" height="300" /><br /><strong><em>(Eating my favorite snack)</em></strong></p><p><br />"KC Teacher, do you know fire eggs?" Leo asks. </p>

The Fart to End All Farts

<p>Men just want to be remembered. Whether it's by conquering the most land, the most broads, or the most Waffle House hashbrowns in under 30 minutes, we want to do something that will make people say, "Hey, that KC Freeman—he DID something with his life."</p>

How to Make Your Dick Bigger

<p><img src="/files/u46/DSCN4322.jpg" width="400" height="533" /><strong><em> <br />(Before reading my tips on how to make your tallywacker bigger)</em></strong></p>

Master KC Meets His Bratface Son

'Hello KC, my name is Clarence Johnson. You banged my mom 18 to 30 years ago. I'm your long lost son… (intense ellipses and dramatic dun dun DUNNNN music)'

Pre-Halloween Headaches

<p><img src="/files/u46/oct_31_09_2_021.jpg" alt="" width="400" height="300" /><br /><strong><em>(Beam me up, Scotty!)</em></strong></p><p>It's the first week of October and you know what that means...only two and a half months to shop until Christmas! Also, you should already start looking for a Halloween costume. And like<a href="/columns/nathan-degraaf"> Nate Degraaf</a>, I'm here to help.</p>

Teaching Job vs. Bar Job

In my days as a bouncer, I've flattened a few noses, but guess what? The kids I teach now still want to punch me, kick in my nuts, and stab me with safety scissors.

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