Welcome to My Beautiful Store Where I Won’t Tell You About the Bugs
But friend, we are far from alone. We share this space with a legion of bugs.
Comedy Writing
My Acceptance Speech After Answering One Question Correctly at Bar Trivia
I am here to keep the small talk alive because everyone else is so locked in that they forget how to socialize.
Job Listing for a Company That Does Things Hella Different
If you care deeply about results and have at least four buddies named Tyler, we can’t wait to meet you.
I’m a Small Business Owner in a Credit Card Commercial, and My Cross Stitch Company Is a Drug Front
Last week, I sold two pieces of cross-stitch art, and my business netted $30,000. You do the math.
I’m a Dog Architect, and Here’s Why Your Whole House Should Be Windows
With your current design, there’s no way to know if someone is approaching. I don’t think a homeowner should ever put himself in a situation like that.
I’m the Brand Voice for a New Start-Up, and I’m Super Horny for My Target Demographic
We feel lucky to be in your life at all. And honestly, we hate that you aren’t single. Sometimes we feel like we should be paying you $39.99 a month.
An Obituary for Your “College Friends” Group Chat
The college group chat will be remembered for its many colorful names, conferred by different members of the chat across its 11 years of existence.