The Golden Ticket Survivors Support Group
For everyone telling me to get over it? Remember that I was juiced! As a child!
Comedy Writing
Clark Kent, We Have Updated Your Ancestry DNA Results!
Our new, improved algorithm now reports that you are: 99.9% not of the human genome <1% Pacific Islander
A Letter to My Past Self, Currently Caught in a Time Travel Paradox
The person who left the initial voicemail saying, “Come to the lab immediately?” That’s Dave 7.
Autopsy Report – Cause of Death: Toxic Masculinity
Abrasions and trace amounts of stucco on knuckles indicate he had punched a wall in the last 8 hours.
Kickstarter Update #37 – Our 3D Printed Water Bottles and Co-founder Are Being Held Hostage by Pirates
From what Eric told me before his cell phone cut out, these bottles are entirely worth the extra eight months of R&D.
HR’s Response to the Always Be Closing Speech from “Glengarry Glen Ross”
Always Be Conscious of your employee’s emotional state before saying anything that might be construed as offensive or unnecessarily ruthless.
David Foster Wallace Writes CVS Receipts
Nasal Decongestant [1] [1] Allergies have been an issue for Hal ever since a trip to Puget Sound 20 years ago prompted his esophagus to close up.