The Rise and Rise of Cheese
Some call it the yellow fruit. Some call it the holy friend of ham. Most call it cheese; and all love it, apart from Nazis and terrorists.
Comedy Writing
You’re Safe in the Arms of Hubert Warren, Jr., Chief of Police
I joined the police in 1987 hoping they'd provide me a weapon I could use to kill my ex-wife’s dog. Turns out I was natural police material.
Diary of a Men’s Room Attendant: Reflections from a Toilet
The following are excerpts from the journals of Frank Malinowski, a men's room attendant from Queens, NY, who was replaced by a hand dryer.
The Steak Incident
I believe it was the winter of 1984; my father and I were out having dinner to celebrate my birthday. Unfortunately, he insisted on having steak at the restaurant.