Catcalls from the Final Days Before Doomsday Destruction
Hey girl, let me get your number, along with any additional resources you might have lying around, like a spare oxygen tank.
Comedy Writing
Could You Help Me Get Down from This Bunk Bed?
Behind every great man may be a great woman. But behind every great woman is an epic bunk bed.
You Can Do Anything You Want in Life, As Long as You Get Past the Crushing Weight of Reality
Maybe you could just be an accountant who wears a tiara and pets a teacup poodle whilst shoveling through student loan debt for the rest of her life.
Hi, I’m Your Christmas Lights That You’ve Had Up Since November—Please Take Me Down
Now, instead of giving off the "vibes" of a Hallmark movie, I'm basically just a glorified lasso wrapped around your windowsill.
An Open Letter from an Unwanted Jar of Vaseline
I feel like you’ve been kind of distant lately. Hanging out with those new fancy ass moisturizers and toners you bought on sale at Sephora.