>>> Primal Urges
By staff writer Nathan DeGraaf

December 27, 2006

Nathan: Maybe I should do one of those year-end, season’s greeting letters for all my friends.
Chip:
What, you don’t put enough disgusting shit on the internet?

Well all, it sure has been a crazy year in our household. For the first time in a few years, I actually got myself a girlfriend. Of course, she was sex-crazed and insane, but what can you do? Just to show you how soft I’m getting in my old age, the nymphomaniac actually cheated on me and I didn’t see it coming. Oh well. You live and you live and all that.

Also, back in April, PIC’s own Michael Curtiss and Court Sullivan visited me. We had a real great time, I guess, but we don’t remember most of it. All I can tell you is that money was spent and the vacation yielded no permanent scars. So that’s good.

“The Cardinals won the World Series. Did I mention how huge a deal this is?”

A little later, I would attend my first St. Louis Cardinal Spring Training Game of the year. This ended up being really awesome because in August I was able to take my niece to her first regular season Cardinal game in St. Louis. The Cardinals would eventually win the World Series so this was a very huge deal for the DeGraaf apartment. I think even my new lizard roommate felt the vibe. Of course, that could have been bug spray, but whatever. He seemed into it. And it’s hard to know with lizards.

Back in June, I visited my old college roommate and good friend Doug in New York City. We had a real great time, I guess, but we don’t remember most of it. All I can tell you is that money was spent and the vacation yielded no permanent scars. All’s well that ends well.

When fall came, and I finally finished having rebound sex with every engaged, married and seriously involved slut in the Tampa region, I was finally able to settle down, enjoy the cool weather, and watch the Cardinals win the World Series. Did I mention how huge a deal this is? I think I may have but I just can’t stress this enough. The Cardinals won the World Series. That’s important.

I spent Thanksgiving at my buddy Tony’s house, where I further learned how awesome it is to eat a whole bunch of good food, sit on my widening ass, and watch football. I mean, I don’t think it gets more American than that. And if it does, I don’t want to be a part of it (I’m patriotic).

As the year finally came to a close, I found myself once again on an airplane, flying to St. Louis to celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior by receiving a whole bunch of stuff that has “2006 World Series St. Louis Cardinals” written, embroidered, or stenciled on it. Oh, and I ate a lot of steak.

And of course, I’m still writing for Points in Case, the one place on the internet where a person can write just about anything he wants and not lose his job. Here, I’ll prove it: Court Sullivan is a dirty Mexican Jew who drinks his own urine for fun. (He’ll probably leave that in. He’s cool like that.) PIC has changed a lot too this year. We added a whole bunch of new writers, and lost Mikey Faerber to assistant editing and Justin Rebello to corporate America. But you probably know that, since you’re reading the site right now.

Anyway, I just hope you and yours had a wonderful holiday and were incredibly pleased with the St. Louis Cardinals, who won the World Series.

Love to all,
Nathan

Related

Resources