“This is my friend, Sherlock Holmes. He’s from America.” “Not just America, actually. I’m from Chicago.”
Undergo hypnosis therapy: you can’t lose time recalling an actor’s name if you never knew their name to begin with.
Turn the sheet so that the elastic edge faces you. Do not look directly at it, lest it sense your anxiety.
But no one really knows what they want when they’re hiring, and that’s why there’s me. To get rid of people like you. Quality people.
Periodically you might encounter your double. Do not engage, especially for sex.
Pottery: This one is simple: the night your wife called things off, you drank an entire bottle of wine and "Ghost" randomly started playing on Tubi.
Name: Dick Van Dyke Species: Jerk Physical Appearance: Tall and rude. Personality: Straight white man.
A shy pastor is one who waits for the choir boy to make the first move.
I’m a recovering workaholic. I haven’t had a job for six years.
Weather forecasters have been getting threatening messages lately. But to be optimistic they’re calling them “partly non-threatening.”
Is it time to overthrow the self-doubt that has plagued your absurd, tender heart for all these months? Subtract eight points if your heart is neither tender nor absurd.
I’m not sure if you are aware that my hands were a little wet when the pickle jar was passed to me.
I’m not very good with computers, could you clarify what you mean by “you somehow attached your son to your previous email rather than your story”?
Soon, I’ll have to decide which to marry. For now, we do a lot of courtship. One of them might stare at me, and I stare back.
