This is for Mandy at Mulligan’s last night: As I was about to say before your boyfriend started sling-shot-ing punches to my face, my name is Peter. Hi.
–Peter
p.s. He seems violent. You should dump him.
Give me a call and we’ll talk about it.
(sorry for the incidental boob touch).
(717) 645-88–
w4m: You were the guy who accidentally (I hope) ran over his neighbor’s dog. I was the woman who offered you a blanket, then bound the dog w/ ankle weights and helped you dispose of the body at sea (also told you about spraying the area w/ ammonia to remove any DNA evidence). Anyway, I felt some sex chemistry. Let’s experiment?
Margret: I’m having an affair w/ your friend, Ashley. We need to talk; I think we should get a divorce.
Bryan Wheeler
Ps. Jory or Kardon, if you boys find this, go get mommy—she’s probably doing her fucking “isometrics” (guzzling wine by the quart) in the basement—tell her there’s something she needs to read.