Ultimate Dog®: Male Dog Enhancement to Get Those Bitches Howling!
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Tag: Corporate
Five People You Will Work With in Any Office
"The Lifer" has been doing the same job for over 30 years and, despite your complaints, still wears his misery like a warm blanket on a blustery winter night.
Our Dissident Art Needs Continued NEA Support to Expose the Meaningless Striving of People with Regular Jobs
In-your-face artists who reject truth and beauty (but will never clean up their own mess) deserve federal support because they are more creative than you.
You Didn’t Get the Job, But I Think We’d Make Great Friends
Unfortunately, we've decided to go a different way. But we honestly did enjoy our conversation and I was wondering, do you want to hang out sometime?
Don’t Get a Job: Commencement Address to the College Graduating Class of 2017
The last thing you want to do is get a job. Don't let anyone make you feel guilty because you are right in your actions to not want to go to work - it sucks.
6 Life Lessons They Won’t Teach You in College
What you never learned is that you're a replaceable peon, your career means nothing, your marriage will fail, and nobody loves you. Don't worry though, you were a mistake to begin with.
The Rise of the Coffee Machines
The company manual has everything from an optimistic “Career Progression” to shrug-worthy “Credit Card, Corporate” but nothinganything under “Coffee Machine, Operating Safely.”
The Internet is a Dangerous Place Full of People More Talented Than You
Lurking behind every YouTube thumbnail is a well-camouflaged bear trap, waiting to violently snap shut on your already fragile sense of self-worth.
Honey Boo Boo’s White House Intern Application
Like you, Mr. President, I'll do whatever it takes to win. Have you seen the footage of my landslide victory at the watermelon eating contest?
What It’s Like Being a Telemarketer From Hell
From 150 miles under the bandstand of Toms River, NJ, a demon explains what it's like to be a timeshare telemarketer in Hell.
It Must Be Nice Having the Job Security That Comes With Acting
Compared to investment banking, my colleagues tell me acting is almost completely recession-proof. People will buy tickets to shows even if they don't have the money to buy them!
Selected Reviews from the 9 Worst Yelp-Reviewed Sperm Banks
My tuxedo-clad sperm steward Rene greeted me in French and explained, “All of our top grade sperme de France is aged to perfection."