Help! Prince Charming Really Just Method Actor
Our first date was straight out of a rom-com. Like, literally! He took me to Fenway Park, just like in Fever Pitch.
Tag: Movies and TV
To Thank LeBron James for His Brave Defense of China, We Will Be Forcing All of Our Political Prisoners to Watch “Space Jam 2”
I only hope that our political prisoners will love the movie as much as LeBron loves the money he'll get from it.
The Thing about High School Girls Is That They Stay the Same Age, And So Do I Ever Since I Drank from That Magic Well
Some may see the age gap as a little weird, but it's not nearly as weird as if I looked my real age, because then I would be a decaying skeleton.
If Other Awards Ceremonies Were like the Oscars and Emmys
First off, I would like to thank the Ridge Hill Community Soccer organization for re…
Don’t Get Mad, Get “Even Stevens” on Blu-Ray
A timeless piece of television, "Even Stevens" demonstrates the trials and tribulations of being “imperfect” in a seemingly perfect world.
Just Because We Don’t Agree on Everything Doesn’t Mean I, Harry Potter, Can’t Still Be Friends with Lord Voldemort
And believe me, I get it. I, of all people, know that Lord Voldemort’s beliefs go against pretty much everything I stand for.
Don’t Even Think About Surgically Replacing Your Face with That of the Man Who Killed Your Son Without Buying My “Art of Speedboat Combat” DVD Box Set
Once you've put on his face, the propellers are in motion--in two days you'll be in a high-octane boat chase with the man who shot your beautiful boy.
Yet Another Democratic Debate Drinking Game
If Andrew Yang offers to give away more money at random, go ahead and make a pitcher of margaritas.
Upcoming Disney Live-Action Remakes
The Emperor’s New Groove: Was the world clamoring for a remake of this 2000 sort-of hit that was almost universally praised as “fine?”
An Open Letter to the Guy in the Subway Playing the “Rocky” Theme on the Melodica as I Carried Two Bags of Groceries
One minute I was thinking, did I need to buy a bag of tangelos? But the next minute I was hearing the uplifting strains of your enchanting song.
I’m Afraid the Construction Crew Is Catching On, Master Bruce
“Are you sure Mr. Wayne needs these titanium bomb doors to his---uh, what’s this room for again?” one worker asked.
The Rodney Dangerfield School of Cinema Presents: Martin Scorsese’s Top 8 Films—But Enough about My Tractor-Trailer Wife
Taxi Driver. Oyoyoy. Ya know, my wife once said she wants to have sex in the backseat of a taxi. I says, “Great!” She says, “Perfect… you drive!”