Why I Think Jaws Should Be Remade With a Car Instead of a Shark
How am I supposed to be stricken with deep-sea terror when I know Martin Brody is more likely to die by Range Rover than shark attack?
Tag: Movies and TV
The SNL and Game of Thrones Controversies are Sucking the Life Out of TV
The problem with these controversies is that eventually everything will be played safe, no boundaries will be pushed, and old models that previously worked will be rehashed.
Spock and Friends
There is no journalistic integrity and there never was. There's only the dogged pursuit of money, power, fame, and orgasm. And I'm pretty sure Spock knew that.
How Officer John McClane’s Recklessness Nearly Ruined Our Family
My intention for writing this was never to shame Officer McClane. In fact, I've learned to forgive the "cowboy cop" altogether. But there is a lesson to be learned from this.
Dear Admiral Ackbar, Please Stop Torturing Us with the Trap Joke
Listen Admiral Ackbar, we all agree you're doing a super job as admiral, but we'd appreciate it if you could stop yelling "It's a trap!" for the rest of the hunting trip.
6 Horror Movies for First World Problems
Jessica was just a normal, everyday HR Rep with everything going for her: a nice place, a great boyfriend, and a good job. That is, until she woke up ALONE.
We Can Change the World (We Won’t Though)
We could save the world, but there are a bunch of new shows on and a couple of cute girls coming over because I informed them that I brought over these drugs. So, nah.
Movie Reviews of John and Bethany’s Sex Tape
"Although it's clear there's certainly some raw talent here, it needs to be given a good spit shine. Also, rocking bod, Beth." -Gary Summers, Washington Post
5 Reality TV Shows Repurposed for Maximum Drama
Reality TV shows are a dime a boring dozen these days. That's why we've created "The Real Housewives of Mogadishu" and "Top Homeless Chef"!
The 7 Absolute Worst Spinoff TV Shows This Fall
These are the network TV shows this fall that beg the question, "Are these network executives planning to seek professional help for their drug problems?"
Dumbfounded Priest Officiates Soap Opera Wedding
Oh great, the ring bearer is Bryan, Ashley's TOTALLY PLATONIC best friend and brother of her husband, Ryan. Surely his rugged good looks won't fuel any drama.
3 Retro Cartoons That Deserve a Reboot (And 3 That Don’t)
The financial success of the Transformers films has proven that rebooting retro cartoons can be big, big business. Here are 3 more cartoons due for a comeback.