America | Page 8 | Points in Case

Tag: America

Any establishment that denies me entry because I have twenty-seven thousand honeybees swarming on his face has no regard for personal freedom.

When I hear "go postal" I think of: A. Guns. B. The Post Office. The Post Office is the problem. C. Wasn’t that a video game from the ‘90s?

I have been crewed to the Ba Ba Buoy, as fine a ship as exists. She is equipped with not only White Claw, but also Truly Hard Seltzer & Twisted Tea.

Alright, let me check my phone. No response? That’s completely cool. I’ll just play with my dog for a little bit.

Our great nation was built on the backs of people just like me: MBAs who got their jobs through their dad’s business connections.

Subsequent to receiving this letter, you will hear ABBA songs inside your head everywhere you go, no matter what you happen to be doing.

While people escape outdoors / There will be shortage the like of which was never seen / As masses storm stores / For parchment used to keep clean

You are unwise to lower your defenses. / Many of the truths we cling to depend greatly on our own point of view. / You’re just a child with a mask.

It is not my fault that your son got a splinter from the demolished wood pieces that I judiciously donated to your lawn.

Level 1 Boss: Twitter user with American flag emoji in profile / Special Attack: Signature Retweet-and-Comment, usually in form of an OANN headline.

We may not have the NBA Bubble, but we do have the NHL Geodesic Sphere. It’s an exhibit called "1999: World of Tomorrow," and it’s your new home.

If there’s not enough pollution in the air to do serious damage to your lungs, doctors will suddenly find themselves out of work.