We Were Young and in Love and It Was Nuclear Winter
After beating that mutant horde, do you remember how we just couldn't go any further and decided to picnic atop the fallen corpses of our enemies?
Tag: Apocalypse
My Daily Skincare Routine, Post-Nuclear Holocaust
I don’t have to worry about sun protection because we are not even sure the sun exists anymore.
The Essential Infowars Supplements
Super Male Vitality: We went to a gas station and bought every dick pill that we could. Then we crushed them up and put them into a vial.
Gift Ideas to Help Republican Grandparents Bribe Their Grandkids into Not Hating Them for Dooming Humanity
A skateboard is cool. No need for safety gear, either. You obviously don’t give a shit what happens to your grandkids, so a helmet would be confusing.
I Am Very Special
This mug featured nine cats smiling at me and each other with the encouraging words, “You’re very special,” written in delicate script above them.
Bob Ross’ The Joy of Painting an Industrial Society and Its Future
A painting or a bomb could cause the right amount of surprise and confusion to shake people out of their stupors, if you mail it to the right person.
Movie-Line Outtakes
"Favorite sled." -- Charles Foster Kane, Citizen Kane
God Sends Hate Mail to Mike Pence
As a result of that whole "free will" blunder, any direct divine intervention is off the table. We did, however, agree to a compromise arrangement.
Advice From One Mad Scientist to Another: Don’t Open That Interdimensional Gateway
I’m not quite sure how to begin but I know too well how it ends: with tendrily monsters eating your loved ones.
Weathermen in a Warming Future
Expect showers outside. Please keep following the ban on indoor showers; it’s hard to believe it's been 20 years since the Great Water War.
Breaking Down the Trump Administration’s Moves and Their Impact on the Tanking Effort
While not a standout diplomat by any means, there was always the fear of Tillerson putting together a semi-competent performance.
I’ve Talked to the Aliens and They Say We’re Fucked
Contrary to popular opinion, the aliens said even doomsday preppers won't make it that far in an apocalypse. They were explicit on this.