Signs Your Manic Pixie Dream Girl May Be Less of a “Breakfast at Tiffany’s” and More of a “Depression Meal at Walmart”
As she trails off, she restarts "The Office" on Netflix for the twenty-fifth time and pulls her couch blanket over herself.
Tag: Arts
What Elementary School Was Like in Each Decade
The 1960s: Students are now allowed to bring lunches with them to school.
Me, Frankenstein Monster, Am Victim of Angry Mob and Me Blame George Soros
Fake News say it bad thing that me want Bavaria to be good neighbor of Transylvania. Say Dracula sadistic bloodsucking despot.
Movies Reviewed By Me, a Teen in the Early 2000s, Based on What I Saw Before I Started Making Out
"Gone in 60 Seconds": I watched until they stole their first car, which was, fittingly, 60 seconds. I got the gist. Commence make-out.
An Inside Look at the Crack Marketing Team at Pornhub
If I’ve already showered I’ll typically just pour something sticky on my head like honey or maple syrup and pretend it was an accident.
Excerpts from the Harry Potter Series, Reprinted in the Trumpian Translation
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix: This one’s about people from different backgrounds coming together to fight for a greater good. Skip!
Welcome to Your Guided Meditation for Creatives
Now that we’re well into our session, stop and rearrange your bookshelf. Go ahead. It’s like productive procrastination which is almost meditation.
I Tried Eating Like an Instagram Foodie for a Week and Turns Out I’m Not Too Young to Have a Heart Attack
You can never go wrong with pizza, eggs, sushi, unicorn foods, pizza, pasta, rosé, ramen, tacos, or pizza.
An Open Letter to the Guy Next to Me Writing an Open Letter to the Smug Barista Who Threw Shade at Me
Yes, honored Seat Neighbor, you have described the whelp's arrogance in a manner both just and poetic. Yes, poetic!
Superheroes in the Millennial Legion
As Acai City’s newest hero, Millennial Girl is committed to protecting and serving all citizens born between 1981 and 1998.
“Mission: Impossible Fallout” Fails to Fully Capture My Experience of Life as a White Man
I’m worried about the young white boy who watches this movie and doesn’t realize there’s pleasure in riding a helicopter that doesn’t entail gunfire.
This Eulogy for My Stepdad is Also a Promo for My Podcast
Making people feel connected was important to him. I think it would mean a lot to him to continue connecting with people by following us on Twitter.