Books | Page 12 | Points in Case

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One of your boyfriend’s friends bullies you, does your boyfriend… a) ...stand up for me! b) ...not do anything for sexy and mysterious reasons.

Remember that I couldn't get my Hogsmeade form signed while a murderer was after me, and I still snuck out for my first sip of butterbeer.

My question is whether, if this is fated to happen, I can nudge it along by killing my boss. --Name Withheld in Scotland

“Young ladies and gentlemen, meet Finnius Fletcherbottom, head professor of our newest department, necessary this year, Wizarding IT!”

Mr. Bingley - Headed back to his parents mansion the moment shit went down. Makes parody videos in front of his pool. Tanned—like, SO tanned.

“Be where your enemy is not.” When your roommate occupies the shower, secure the sofa or most comfortable communal chair, as well as the remote.

If I were spitballing names for an evil mountain, I feel like “Mount Doom” would be one of the first things I thought of.

Tired of quarantining, Raskolnikov becomes convinced that society must sacrifice the old for the greater good.

“I was reluctant to try Tinder, too. You never know what weirdos you might find. Anyway, I enjoyed reading my entire dissertation aloud to you."

Shut Up: How Talking Makes It Harder to Communicate and Causes Large Fires / Dogs: They Were Puppies Once / Losers: The Real Winners, Who Lost

"A Comedy of Errors": Antipholus of Syracuse and Antipholous of Ephesus race in identical Fiats, comically thinking each one is chasing the other.

Tomorrow I’ll open up "Moby Dick" and listen to that iconic first line, “Call me Captain Ahab, because I’m in charge of this whaling operation now.”