Christmas Letter from the Millers
When not studying, Teddy enjoys playing with action figures despite the fact that he's a grown man. Johnny, my feral child, fathered a couple of kids.
Tag: Books
Updating Christmas Stories and Songs for the Modern World
"It’s A Wonderful Life": George and Mary’s kids, Pete, Janie, Tommy, and Zuzu, all die because George and Mary refused to have them vaccinated.
A Cormac McCarthy Character Goes Christmas Shopping at Costco
I hope I don't have to use the revolver, but this is Costco—godless territory where wild men purchase two-gallon tins of popcorn on any given day.
Christmas Gifts for the “Creative” in Your Life
For the Improviser: If you’re looking to give a gift that lasts, offer them $450 to never improvise again.
How Can We Be Expected to Fear the Grinch If He’s Never Even Taken a Man’s Life: An Editor’s Note to Dr. Seuss
Nobody just carves a roast beast like that. Not without training. This guy has combat skills. Probably ex-marine gone rogue. Let’s see him in action.
A Skeptic’s Guide to an “Enlightening” Family Christmas
6. Hold Your Family’s Feet to the Fires of Capitalism --- Santa Claus? A soulless creation of Coca-Cola to help them hock a sugary beverage.
5 Tastefully Decorated Tiny Homes That Also Happen to Be Haunted
Drive down a country road, past a bucolic house with spectral corpses in the trees, and you’ll see this beautiful tiny home: 500 square feet of bliss.
Help! I’m the Cialis Guy and I’m Trapped in an Eli Roth Film
Suddenly, I recall a woman—lovely, virile—a gal very active for her age. Did we meet in a bookstore? Or was it an antique shop?
4 Leather Jackets That May Not Be Able to Fix Your Broken Relationship With Your Daughter, But Will Make You Look Cool as Hell
Marlon Brando famously wore this style of jacket in "The Wild One," but he was later jailed for being deemed “too sexy” and died in prison.
Belle’s Breakup Letter to the Beast
I need a strong, carnivorous lover, not a submissive creature of the field.
I Am a Funny, Funny Book in a Barnes & Noble Display and I Want to Be With Your Niece
Let me guess: 21? Barnard student? Appears edgy at holidays, but how edgy? You wouldn't know. Perhaps... I can help.
Who Watches Your Instagram Stories at Night
Your mom; Dude you haven't seen since elementary school---didn’t he go to jail?; Memorial account for your deceased friend.