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Tag: Cars

To keep you safe on long interstate drives, Mother's Gap Lane Assist simulates a choking gasp from your mother’s throat when you veer out of lane.

Bruce has been a policeman for 40 years and retires in 27 days. If you know anything about law enforcement, he will certainly die on his last day.

An essential precaution against these hazardous situations is making sure that you’re walking back toward your house before getting out on the road.

Time is money. Time flies. And therefore, the bus driver flies. Though side roads, through shortcuts, through worryingly narrow gaps.

The process of picking one menu item reminded your wife of how she did not have to pick just one Pep Boy, since they are all polyamorous.

At first, I was frightened of you, unsure of your intentions, and your driving style did nothing to calm me.

3. Lisa’s dad: Mr. Hardaway is a Lyft driver. Here is what that means: top-notch amenities.

I know it’s not very masculine, but it’s really more for my family than anything. I would have gone with a bigger one if not for my wife.

My mom has always wanted me to lift cars like she did: a hatchback off my sister, an SUV off my brother, and the family van off me.

Instead of buying a latte, deposit $5,000 in an IRA. Do that every single day and within less than a year you’ll have nearly a million dollars!

I know what you're thinking: how do you think holding another bikini car wash is appropriate when we haven’t cleaned up the blood from the last one?

I cannot forgive you for making me spend what would have been my final year at Hogwarts shitting in the woods.