No, you can’t go get a few toys. Last time you left them lying around and I had to clean them up. / Here, can I just… let me help you.
Project Runaway Train: Designers are placed on trains careening toward the edge of a cliff at groundbreaking speed.
Karpas --- Eating the Green Vegetable: Is this the first vegetable you’ve had all month? We raised you better than to eat all that junk food.
CAPABLE: Coordinating and implementing first person shooter strategy and tactics / SEEMINGLY INCAPABLE: Separating laundry
“Live, Laugh, Love” in Cursive: Are you a human or the wall clock I bought from the Home Goods clearance section?
One especially pleasing development is how Grandpa has started taking responsibility for his actions.
Buckaroo, it’s time to pack away the silly stuff and focused on what you might actually achieve before the ice caps melt and we have to build an ark.
A struggling WNBA player - Of course, your daughter can absolutely be the best point guard in the WNBA! / Probably bisexual - Give her to age 25.
Since you believe we’re immune to feelings, it only makes sense that you believe we’re immune to the coronavirus, too.
The bedroom. The native language here has more than 50 known words to mean “anxiety” and the local motto is “we’re totally fucked.”
I am a swim coach for kids. That’s right, I spend my shifts in a cesspool of germs and boogers.
"A badass mama protects her child! Your belly will be full of pilates-toned gristle and blond hair after you’ve mauled Cassie from your mom group."