The 3 Sleeves on My Sweater, Ranked by How Much I Really Need Them There
Left sleeve: Since my left hand is not my dominant hand, I could probably make it an hour or two without this sleeve, but it wouldn’t be ideal.
Tag: Clothes
15 Printed Onesies Worn by Babies Who Will Eventually Struggle to Move Up Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs
25% Mommy, 25% Daddy, 25% Mommy’s Yoga Coach, 15% Daddy’s Secretary, 5% Tinder Guy Who Was Into Daddy and Daddy’s Secretary, 5% Lube, 100% PERFECT ME!
Welcome to Gnomebox, the Toddler Fashion Service with Totally Innocuous Motives!
You have a toddler; we have a dwindling supply of troops for a little ongoing altercation with neighboring trolls. Let’s help each other!
An Interview with the Monster Who Designed Your High School Uniform
And my 2007 Autumn/Winter collection: drab brown and caution-tape yellow. Such a foul combination that no one had ever thought to use it before!
Merch from Elite Colleges I Did Not Attend
My Princeton hoodie, whose drawstrings are connected to my arms, so if you pull them you can turn me into your personal puppet.
Five Pieces for Styling Middle-To-Low Income Looks on a Million Dollar Budget
Easy, effortless transitional pieces for looking like a regular person who may or may not have health insurance.
Can You Afford What’s Inside That Cool Retail Store?
Did you reach for a pair of jeans, but a security guard asserted, "Please don’t touch the art"? You can't afford it.
We’ll Tell You How These Women’s Lives Turned Out Based on the Winter Coat They Wore in 6th Grade
Leather Jacket – Doesn’t believe in monogamy but has lived with one boyfriend for six years; sleeps with phone on the bed, it has its own pillow.
Are You Truly Ready to Ascend to Housecoat Level?
We speak here of the dowdy. The cotton-poly blend. The bland pastel floral with faux-pearl snaps. Armor worn by everyone from Nanas to Meemaws.
Let Me Tell You About My Very Profitable, Benevolent Brand
And before you get skeptical or overthink our business model, this is NOT slave labor repackaged as a benevolent good.
We’re Your Bras and We Know You’ll Come Back
For unmentionables, you sure talk about us a lot. You’ve got boobs on the brain, and that’s why we’re not worried. We know you’ll come back.
Definitely My Quarantine Morning Routine
I definitely don’t lay in bed motionless, hovering between sleep and wakefulness, until finally my hungry cat comes and scream-meows in my face.