As some of you might have figured out, I'm black. The more clever among you might have figured out that Paul Frank is, in fact white. Apparently, however, Paulie Nonuts is still processing this. In the form of sending me something like 20 text messages in the past couple days.
<strong>1. Not kissing first: Avoiding her lips and diving straight for the erogenous zones makes her feel like you're paying by the hour, and trying to get your money's worth by cutting out nonessentials. A properly passionate kiss is the ultimate form of foreplay.</strong><p>Kissing is for eighth graders. Seriously, it's all they blabber about.
I'm full of vitriol. The sort of aimless, unfocused vitriol that leads people to strangle stuffed animals for looking at them funny. You might call me a misanthrope, to which I would only say, "real cool Mr. Latin roots. Too good to say peoplehater? You make me sick." Here, in no particular order with no real purpose, is a list of groups currently worthy of massive derision.<p>
<p><img src="http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/516QGHLnuqL._SL500_AA280_.jpg" border="0" alt="" width="280" height="280" align="top" /> </p><p>I don't understand them.</p><p>No really, I don't understand them. Like, what are the mechanics? Do I just eat the underwear and keep eating? Do I take them off and just stuff the whole thing in my mouth like a ball? </p>
The title isn't a ploy to get you to read this. I assure you that you actually don't care at all about what I'm writing. It's mostly inane sports ramblings with only the most fleeting flirtations with relevance or interest. Considering how few and far between these nuggets of salience are, the only logical conclusion is that they are accidental.<br /><br />Lets move on.<br />
<strong>Characters:</strong><p>A mild-manned and unassuming celebrity billionaire playboy and philanthropist by day and early evening, <strong>Brian Payne</strong> is virtually unknown except to his family, a few close friends, and a large portion of the rest of the world.
<img src="/files/u16/loltm_0.jpg" alt="" width="400" height="382" align="middle" />
You put the waxy edge of the red cup to your lips.<p>Pause.</p><p>You take the next few seconds to consider the contents of your drink. Something with vodka, you presume. It's always something with vodka, you joke with yourself. </p>
<p>Apparently, some teens in some town in Massachusetts had a "pregnancy pact" whereby they agreed to try to get pregnant. Which a lot of people are down on, but I happen to be ecstatic about. Because I love underaged girls, and I love MILFS, and I love a good 2 for 1. </p>
It's so weird that Paul's cousin is going to be on FOX the same week mine is. I'm not sure what day he's going to be on, but if you're a regular FOX watcher, I'm sure you'll see him. He's so excited I bet he's just pacing back and forth over the same three feet. Just in case you are watching, I've attached a picture so you know what to look for. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Any bank can be a sperm bank if the tellers are hot enough. Labels: <a href="/xavier/labels/Nathan%20Degraaf.html">Nathan Degraaf</a>
I often wind up having aim conversations that I think may be of some humor to an outsider. Congratulations, you're now an outsider. This probably won't be an overly regular thing, just a once in a while little treat. inblack* (12:15:04 AM): they have this thing called operation gay domination inblack (12:15:25 AM): where they try to seduce straight guys