To-Do List 2017: Apocalypse Won
Choose robot companion for president, as you inevitably prefer living in a blinged up White House adorned with gold droplets of dried Mexican tears.
Tag: Donald Trump
Trump University Announces Six New Courses for 2017
In "PS 102 - The New Racism" we'll show you how to dismiss any challenge to your racist views—no matter how valid—as liberal "political correctness" run amok.
The Only Thing We Have to Fear is Fear Itself—And Everything Else
What would be the countless ripples born by an administration that insists that the only thing to fear is not fear itself, but the consequences of hope?
The First 100 Days of Trump
Day 33: Trump announces the appointment of his boyhood idol as Treasury Secretary. Scrooge McDuck is approved by a Republican congress the next day.
The Real Reason Trump Won Was Because Betsy Miller Turned Me Down in the Sixth Grade, and Don’t Let Anybody Tell You Otherwise
I've cracked the case wide open. It all traces back to the 1998 Tropical Para-Dance at Windy Meadow Middle School.
Updated List of Bands That Have Declined to Perform at Trump’s Inauguration
Houston-based rockers Glennwood Johnson and His Exploding Knees, once described by Rolling Stone as "…a musical act," has declined due to moral concerns.
‘Twas the Night Before Inauguration
The coffers were hung by Big Business with care, in hopes that St. Donald Trump soon would be there.
I Guess I’m Going to the Inauguration By Myself Again This Year
Asking a girl to the inauguration is a rite of passage for teens, but everybody says they're going "as a group" this year, and I can't find a stupid date.
The Founding Fathers on Donald Trump
In a PIC exclusive heavenly interview, the Founding Fathers react to Donald Trump's rise to the White House.
Things I’m Looking Forward to in 2017
It's a brand new year and we can finally put all that BS behind us... unless you're David Bowie, Prince, George Michael, or Carrie Fisher.
Exclusive Tell-All Interview with 2016
We sat down with 2016 for a frank, one-on-one discussion on everything from Harambe to Trump to gay rights.
Time is Running Out for Obama to Implement Sharia Law
Constitutional scholars are already working to find loopholes so President Trump can reverse all impending evil jihadist programs.