Food | Page 27 | Points in Case

Tag: Food

Just touching base with you on this month’s miracles. As you know, miracles are one of our key performance indicators this quarter.

I present to you The Chef Boyardee Fuckayous, a meal that speaks for many immigrants (like myself) who are being deported from the United States.

Self-cleaning. Enchanted with spell that bewitches child into consuming lunch regardless of fiber content. Doubles as USCG-approved flotation device.

These Mason jars today---all they do is hang around waiting for some kid to go on Pinterest and search “rustic chic wedding.”

Did you know that there's a hunger epidemic going on? And more importantly, did you know that the office switched to ordering from Fresh Direct?

Judging by how few followers he had, I probably knew him best.

5:35PM: Turn down a one-way street going in the opposite direction. I read somewhere that street signs don't apply when you only have two wheels.

Or you know when you have a bottle of champagne and you need to release the cork and you loosen it with your thumb? I invented that.

My parents knew they had early mornings in the factory, just working towards the American dream, but there was something special about that night.

Beach Dreams Unfulfilled Tropical Cherry – A fruity favorite to remind you that you’re too funemployed to escape or go to Hawaii this summer.

Look forward to a wide variety of items in your CSA box like kale, swiss chard, baby kale, frisee, dino kale, a bunch of spiky weeds, and red kale.

Age 6: Has pastel-colored hair to stand out in a crowd. Age 60: Spends $10 monthly to ensure ID theft protection and anonymity.