How to Have a Happy Relationship Even Though You’re Not Dating Mister Rogers
Fred had a song for every occasion: feeling happy, excited, blue. He even called it, “feeling blue,” and not “oh, so you’re taking another nap today?”
Tag: Food
Angry Tweets from a Passenger on the Oregon Trail
We only have 700 miles left! Might be dehydration or crippling fever but think I love these friggin people! Thank you @OTBoltWagons! #final4
What’s On Tap at the Bitter Break-Up Brewery
Petty Fight Pilsner: Remember that yelling match in the parking lot after the old disagreement about whose responsibility it was to feed the fish?
The Streaming Services Order Brunch
Netflix: I’ve changed my order. I want what Hulu’s having, and I want it delivered first.
Well, I Just Got to Hell and the Bagels Freaking Suck
You can take the man out of the big city and send him to Hell for a life of transgressions, but you can’t take the big city out of the man.
Realistic Financial Goals By Age 35
Relationships are about one thing, and one thing only: affordable housing. Find someone who doesn’t smell too bad and lock it down.
I’m Sorry, I Won’t Make a Cake for Your Gay Wedding, Because This is an OshKosh B’Gosh
All I can offer you is 60% off all denim-wear. So yous can getcha some toddler overalls or some jeans for any little tikes yous two may know of.
How to Break It to Your Friend That There is a Skeleton Inside of Him
When he starts pounding on the walls because he is scared and wants to run from the skeleton who you just said was inside him, you must act quickly.
5 Surefire Ways to Get Elton John to Come to Your Open-Casket Funeral
Write “Elton” on your left hand and “John” on your right hand, zoom in, and make it look like Elton John himself is removing your space helmet.
An Open Letter to the Adult Man in Target Who Decided He Didn’t Want Keebler’s Coconut Dreams
As I picked up the box of cookies, I imagined a world where everyone thought it was okay to leave items they didn’t want anymore wherever they please.
Boy Scout Cookies
Dad Bod Mints: Like the popular “Thin Mints,” but thicker, and with a little bit of hair.
Emo Song Titles or Actual Things I’ve Heard at Brunch?
20. I Liked You Better Before You Were Naked on the Internet. 21. Sleepless in Seattle is Not All It’s Cracked Up to Be, Honey