Friends | Page 15 | Points in Case

Tag: Friends

I wish I had said that. Instead, I broke into an ugly cry and stumbled from the room, having jammed a big toe on the life-sized skeleton model.

Admittedly, we were shocked when we noticed people who didn't spring for box seats were drowning below us.

Do you really think that I, a gorgeous seed full of immense potential, want to hinder my growth by spending all of eternity in your intestines?

“Hell” is my collection of art pieces that explores suffering as an innate part of the human condition. What it isn’t is a punishment.

After a bit of soul searching, preceded by rather a lot of ayahuasca in a Christopher Street loft, I’ve decided to radically restructure my tours.

At only $117,000 a pop, the Hellfire II™ is perfect for when you need to make a splash without splashing too much cash.

Qualifications: Ability to fire one-liners and innuendo, as well as sex appeal. You don’t follow rules, but you live by your own personal code.

Previously criticized Medicare-for-all as unaffordable. That's a hard "Michael." Announces "it's a JEEP day!" when the weather is nice. Solid "Mike."

The confirmation page for my gym hadn’t even loaded before I put out a group text to my closest friends telling them that I was a CrossFit guy now.

Wow. If you’ve photoshopped with me before, you know I like big ol’ tushies. And, there he is. That’s a big ol’ tush.

Been married a couple of times---but don't worry, I'm a free man again! And I guess the main thing is that I started working at Odysseus Financial.

The process of picking one menu item reminded your wife of how she did not have to pick just one Pep Boy, since they are all polyamorous.