God | Page 19 | Points in Case

Tag: God

[God's pen is paused above the passage where Noah gets all fat and is lying drunk in a tent after surviving the flood.] ANGEL: Water balloon fight?

"Catch” implies the game will be like the original, instead of my better idea for an abstinence-focused game. The slogan should mention doing chores.

Nazeema is currently on her honeymoon in a country that she can't pronounce or point out on a map. I can pronounce, "kiwi."

No, life is something to cherish. All these people who kick empty soda cans and throw pinecones at my face do so with pure intentions, I'm sure.

fast-forward/the perfect storm./America was at conflict with Iran/Iraq/the political situation/between the countries./between good vs. evil.

Your client wants to suck the bone marrow out of your firstborn. What do you do? A. Respectfully ask that he reconsiders.

10:00 A.M: A phone call! Could it be an inteview? No, just those Mormon missionaries you gave your number to during that “Who am I” phase in college.

As a result of that whole "free will" blunder, any direct divine intervention is off the table. We did, however, agree to a compromise arrangement.

Players who take, like, 20 napkins and then use, like, just two napkins and throw away the other 18 will be ejected from the game.

I have reduced stress by limiting my mental breakdown to three times a week. You would never guess that I've stress vomited in every campus bathroom!

I’d be willing to bet it takes dozens of muscles in the arms, legs, and torso to lift this soda machine off of my shattered body.

Embassies, so complicated. So complex, I would say. Where do they go, who works there, what country are they technically in?