17 Signs Walmart is Seizing Government Control and Declaring Martial Law
You know something is up when the Walmart coffee is unusually fresh, and the deli features sliced human flesh of "those who dare disobey us" for $4.49/lb.
Tag: Guides
5 Reasons It’s Fun to Be the Bad Guy
History will show, and has shown, that the "good" have always been those who conquer, screw over, and suppress. It's what comes naturally.
My Top 10 Childhood Girl Crushes from 90’s Kids Shows
Witchcraft was sketchy and intimidating to most preschoolers in the 90’s, but I wasn’t a little bitch so it was a huge turn-on to me. That's why Sabrina makes the list.
Ideas for Friends Season 11 Episodes
You thought you saw the perfect finale, but what about the one where Phoebe goes on Jeopardy and accidentally says the word "sniggers" live on air?
Top 5 Sexiest Male Psychopaths
We go behind the hockey mask and get under Freddy’s fingernails with horror’s top five sexiest male psychopaths, including Christian Bale, Jeremy Renner, and Gaspard Ulliel.
How to Fold a Fitted Sheet: Instructions for Couples and Singles
Couples: after you've mastered these origami-like instructions, you will soon overcome your fear and loathing of things that come out of the dryer. Singles: don't bother.
Your Pet May Be Trying to Kill You
As pet owners, we like to think that our dog or cat loves us as much as we love them. But sometimes the reality of the situation is, your pet would rather eliminate you.
If Kanye’s Not Bipolar, Neither Am I
Yes, he can be a jerk. Yes, he can Yes, he lives large. But what if he can't help it? Would you bash Kanye if he was bipolar? Oh, you ARE cruel.
10 Tips for New Moms and Strippers
It’s here, the moment you’ve been dreading and looking forward to for what feels like forever: your first day on the job at the strip club, or…you’ve just gone into labor.
How to Have Your Food and Not Pay for It Too
I’m a foodie at heart, but I’m cheap and lazy in reality. With a bit of elbow grease and macaroni, I’ve figured out a way to both have my free cake and eat it to excess.
Softees: Five Reasons Americans are About as Hard as Pudding
People have found so many things to cry about that one can only wonder: what happened to our backbones? Americans used to be tough, now we're straight jelly.
A Nitpicky Guide for Dealing with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder
OCD is no laughing matter. Your face, however, is a different story. In fact, you should probably get that checked out before you seek therapy for your OCD.