Seven Reasons to Put Your Cat in the Microwave
Think about it, why not put your cat in the microwave? Last I heard (and contrary to what our "president" seems to think), this is still a free country. Just do it.
Tag: Guides
Employee Suggestion Box Entries at Madame Tussauds Wax Museum
"If I see another visitor pretending to have sex with the wax Beyoncé I am going to quit. I think we should put bags over the wax celebrities' heads."
The Third Cop in the Good Cop, Bad Cop Routine
Any knuckle-headed crook worth his weight in salt knows better than to fall for the classic good cop/bad cop routine. That's when I come in: tired, horny cop.
Twitter Translations: College Girl Edition
If you're not a seasoned veteran of the Twitter streets then some of these girls' tweets might be hard to decipher. Here's a guide for beginners.
How to Completely Empathize with Road-Raged Drivers
At the Deep-Seated Mentality Driving School, we pride ourselves on initiating drivers how low their brethren can sink, and how they must be prepared for the worst.
The Absolute Douchebag’s Guide to Driving
When selecting a truck, always remember the golden rule: the bigger, the better. This rule will apply to almost everything we talk about, other than your tank top.
5 Valuable Tips for Incoming College Freshman Dudes
The aroma of cargo shorts and freshly purchased lanyards is already filling the air. Here is some first-hand knowledge and advice for incoming freshmen dudes.
A Handy Guide to Omen-Based Investing
Have you ever wanted to start playing the stock market? Here's a list of signs to look out for in your everyday life and how to interpret them for investing purposes.
The Biggest Threat to Marriage Equality is Apophis
We may have won a victory in Washington for gay marriage, but we won't be able to run and hide in Canada when the 99942 Apophis asteroid comes knocking at our door.
Three Compelling Reasons Bigfoot is Real
Doubters of Bigfoot cling tightly to their claim that just because there is no physical evidence of Bigfoot's existence, Bigfoot isn’t real. And that logic just doesn't hold up.
Three Worthless Insights Worth Remembering
Don't lie on the street and have a construction worker ride his jackhammer and drive the sharp-edged side into your forehead. Shocking, I know.
How to Know If You’re a Preptard
A preptard is defined as "One who prepares in great detail for highly improbable scenarios, while ignoring impending decisions like what to eat for dinner."