Hair | Page 9 | Points in Case

Tag: Hair

Is there any way to make the heartburn shoot actual flames out of our mouths? That would be a nice party trick.

Episode 5: Ed Sheeran Sings, Like, 4 Times And Then Dies: I heard he didn't even sing the last time he was on the show. This will be an upgrade.

The name starts with an A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N---yes, I see you nodded in agreement---I mean my psychic premonitions confirmed it.

BARBER: It is customary to tip your barber $15 for each person who complimented your haircut and then immediately had sex with you.

Missed You… Again You: A relaxing holiday. Me: Dehydrated, depleted, stuck in traffic. God, I want you so bad.

After beating that mutant horde, do you remember how we just couldn't go any further and decided to picnic atop the fallen corpses of our enemies?

You’re probably taking a hard look at yourself, reeling with guilt at the thought of all the poor, innocent, mother mosquitos you’ve smooshed.

“FIFTY PERCENT OFF ALL CDS” the dusty words said, in a manic scrawl. “EVERYTHING MUST GO!” Frankie backed away in horror. What was a CD?!

Your emotional stability is hanging by a thread? Well, so is the Dow Jones Industrial Average, baby!

I need a strong, carnivorous lover, not a submissive creature of the field.

We’ve only known each other for a short period, which can be quantified as “just shy of Costco’s return policy,” but we’ve formed a intimate bond.

"You fielded eighteen promposals before February. That's a county record."