We Are Going into a Bubble for My Adult Guitar Recital
With the help of a team of epidemiologists and many lawyers, I’m confident you’ll be able to safely watch me play “Last Nite” by The Strokes.
With the help of a team of epidemiologists and many lawyers, I’m confident you’ll be able to safely watch me play “Last Nite” by The Strokes.
Simon says log in to the government-subsidized video conferencing system and wave at all your friends like everything is normal.
This happens every year. The heat of August sets in and like a bear waking from hibernation, my ravenous appetite for tomatoes reemerges.
The pieces titled "The Clitoris: Nub of Joy!" for Healthy Lady Magazine and "The Ford F-150: Trucks Rule!" for Automotive Life will be one piece.
“I can’t accept this, it’s obviously been used.” “Well yes, but only in January, February, and the first week of March. But then ppffhtt,” I spit.
Protests are okay but I can't go to the Olive Garden because I use the breadsticks for things that are "objectionable" and "extremely upsetting?"
"Her butt is coming out first," my mom's ob-gyn told her six hours into her contractions. "This baby is just not the right fit."
Farmer Fuel: After the success of Gamer Fuel, the soft drink juggernaut tried the same strategy on the agriculture sector.
"Shameless caffeine addiction" just doesn’t cut it. Chances are you’ve also been avoiding your first screening with a gastroenterologist.
If there’s not enough pollution in the air to do serious damage to your lungs, doctors will suddenly find themselves out of work.
I’ve stayed in touch with friends by… A) Hosting non-alcoholic Zoom happy hours. B) FaceTiming an ex at 2AM. C) Spitting peas at my chum’s window.
$5,000 barely scratches the surface of what it’ll take to handle this problem. / Your family won’t recognize you when this is over.