Montezuma Pleads with the Gods to Change His Act of Revenge
When was the last time my name came up and someone said, “Oh, you mean the guy who ruled over the greatest period of expansion in the Aztec empire?”
Tag: History
Disappointing Truths Behind Paranormal Mysteries
Disappointing Truth: Stonehenge is just another case of mass hysteria. In reality, of course, rocks can’t be balanced on top of each other.
To Thank You for Being My Gladiators, I’m Providing Cupcakes
It will be a chance to network over a sweet treat with other gladiators who, in a few days, will try to clobber the life out of you.
Sun Tzu Quotes to Get You Through Thanksgiving
To medal in the Turkey Trot, you have to defeat seasoned fitness freaks and erratic savages who only run once a year.
I’m the Titanic and Climate Change Is Coming for You, You Idiotic Iceberg
You dumb pee stained ice cube, do you understand how embarrassing it is to be sunk on your maiden voyage?
Atlas Carries the Weight of the World on His Shoulders? Big Deal—I Am a Woman with a Heavy Purse
I am a mortal woman in the 21st century, and I carry more tonnage on one shoulder every single day. Go on. Touch my trapezius muscle.
Diary Entries of Batholomew, Jesus’s Least Memorable Apostle
I’ve been in the apostles' crew for almost a year now, but Jesus still makes me wear a nametag every time we hang out.
I Didn’t Research My Historical Baseball Novel Very Carefully
The whole town had gathered in the stands, because they were too poor to afford a place in the seats.
A Viking’s Travel Guide for Your Next Voyage to Vancouver
For all you foodies out there, you should know that very few alehouses carry meade, let alone fresh horsemeat.
I’m Alexander the Great’s Brother and This Reunion Sucks
No Alex was a few years behind us. I’m Allen. See my nametag? Alex is probably off expanding the limits of the Western world or something, the madman.
The Aging Cell Phone in Your Junk Drawer Is Ready to Reunite
I remember when you nervously called your ‘rents at your first “real party” because someone offered you a sip of Mike’s Hard Lemonade.
I Am a Real Person, With Real Feelings, With a Real 48-Foot Medieval Trebuchet
A childhood love of swords became an adulthood of arguing with my spouse about turning our foyer into a showroom of my medieval cutlery collection.