The Donald J. Trump Presidential Library Yacht Puts All Others to Shame
More visitors than Reagan's! Fewer tears than Kennedy's! Less graffiti than Bush's! The Donald J. Trump Presidential library is legit on fleet.
Tag: History
Death Stars Must Be Legalized for Private Ownership
My name is Krazzed Dumm'fuk, proud member of the Galactic Blaster Rifle Association. We must fight to lift the ban on private Death Star ownership.
The Strange But True STD History of Captain James T. Kirk
Captain Kirk developed a reputation as an intergalactic ladies man, but not without enduring a full slate of venereal diseases, cataloged here by Leonard McCoy.
Other Things It is Disgusting and Absurd to Suggest This Administration Supports
In addition to not supporting slavery, I, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, would like to lay out very clearly everything else Donald Trump and this administration opposes.
Help! My Dukes of Hazzard Lunchbox Has Me on the Wrong Side of History
It had the car... with the flag! Yes, THAT flag! What could my mother have been thinking when she gave in to my demands for it?
Let’s Not Make a Big Deal Out of My Viking Funeral Pyre
Less is more, I always said. If you can’t find a fjord in New Jersey, better apply for an ocean permit ASAP so we can have the ceremony at Brigantine Beach.
The Haters and Losers Forget I Defeated ISIS in 30 Days
Haters and losers, folks, haters and losers. So many stupid people, ignoring the facts. Don't even remember I got rid of ISIS in my first 30 days.
Donald Trump’s Google Search History
Go citizen voyeur incognito mode on our president's Google search history. Inhale, breathe, ponder deeply, wonder, pass out.
5 Historical Events Reimagined If Congressional Republicans Had Been in Charge
Republicans have demonstrated unflappable stoicism in the face of foreign attacks, unparalleled corruption, and looming constitutional crisis. How would they have fared with historical events?
Teaching My First Class at Caveman High
I didn't choose to be transported to a pre-historic age, but I did choose to become the teacher of the cavemen and women once I got there. No Neanderthal left behind!
The Cold Hard Truth About Snuffalupagus
So, you want the inside scoop on Snuffy, Big Bird’s best pal? Well, here’s the cold, hard truth: Mr. Snuffalupagus wasn’t imaginary at all, he was a crook.
There is No Santa: A Retraction to “Yes, Virginia, There is a Santa Claus”
Indeed there is no Santa Claus, and we can definitively say it would be impossible for one man to visit all the children in the world in one night.