A 30-Inch Footprint That I Touched and Then Tasted So I Could Begin Tracking Ronald: Without it, I wouldn’t have been able to murmur, “He’s near…”
With your current design, there’s no way to know if someone is approaching. I don’t think a homeowner should ever put himself in a situation like that.
“James, how did it get to this point?” I don’t know. I noticed some mold a while back, but nothing more aggressive than the average moist home.
I love how the natural light comes through the house. It gives whoever wants to break in a little sneak peek of what they’re missing you know?
Not only are my kitchen cabinets sticky and brown, but they contain condos for giant cockroaches who never pay HOA dues.
I used to have 30-45 people in me at once and not a bit of noise bothered the neighbors. Hey! That’s another thing: I’m very noise-proof!
Attempt to escape from torturing memories, from a sense of insupportable loneliness and a dread of some strange impending doom in the sink basin.
All that changed when a (unnamed for legal purposes) billionaire “superhero” with no powers showed up and asked me to join his superhero team.
Home Depot can sell you a mirror, but they can't make you see yourself. I've had plenty of time to think while you were crying over "Property Brothers."
That’s me wearing the torn NASA t-shirt on my favorite couch. I uploaded this photo to show I’m a typical 39-year-old living in his Mom’s garage.
Whose fault is it I don’t look perfect anymore? I’m pretty sure it wasn’t my arms that splashed me with queso dip.
Your home library is all Bibles. I mean, uhh, could He make it any more obvious? The Bible is His favorite book!