I’ve stayed in touch with friends by… A) Hosting non-alcoholic Zoom happy hours. B) FaceTiming an ex at 2AM. C) Spitting peas at my chum’s window.
Phrases evoking imagery of a well-powered cabin like, “pedal like my kitchen appliances depended on it,” could be a huge red flag.
If you happen to hear chanting outside of quiet hours, please do not respond by screaming out, “You call that chanting? I’ll show you chanting!”
Painting that house took a lot of effort and expense. Despite all I went through to realize an artistic vision, that client has refused to pay.
We’ve worked everything out with our mediator, Coffee Table. You can sit with me, Loveseat, on weeknights and with Chaise for naps on weekends.
I acknowledge that I can change my sweatpants if I want to or I can wear the same ones every day forever and only I have the power to choose.
After completing any one of our adventures, your best self will be the one stuck inside with no one to talk to.
Together, you and I shall become pioneers of pest control vexation by breaking down what I call "The Art of Infestation."
You’re gonna want a place near bars, delis, and neighborhood laundromats. These are full of characters who will be furiously vague witnesses.
We’re not real good at giving directions, so we suggest you stop by the quaint post office off Route 40 (or 14?), and ask for Hank.
Coffee shops: “Ugh, I know it’s overpriced, but it’s my guilty pleasure!” is now what I say when I buy healthcare.
Friday Morning, Week 5 / Yellow Bungalow / Trader Joe's beer bottles (10) / Vodka bottle (1 pint) / Cardboard Pop-Tart boxes, cinnamon frosted (1)