How Embarrassing, I Seem to Have Forgotten Which Book Opens My Hidden Bookshelf Door
Is it "The Count of Monte Cristo" that solves this dreadful riddle? Surely a subtle nod to enclosed spaces will do it…. No.
Tag: Houses
Which Quarantine Type Are You: Health Nut, Couch Potato, or 19th Century Working-Class British Child, Based on My Impression from BBC Period Dramas?
I’ve stayed in touch with friends by… A) Hosting non-alcoholic Zoom happy hours. B) FaceTiming an ex at 2AM. C) Spitting peas at my chum’s window.
5 Signs Your Spin Instructor Has Been Exploiting Your Class to Power His Lake House
Phrases evoking imagery of a well-powered cabin like, “pedal like my kitchen appliances depended on it,” could be a huge red flag.
Apartment Rules That May or May Not Relate to the Recent Cult Activity
If you happen to hear chanting outside of quiet hours, please do not respond by screaming out, “You call that chanting? I’ll show you chanting!”
My Unique Vision for Your Home’s Exterior
Painting that house took a lot of effort and expense. Despite all I went through to realize an artistic vision, that client has refused to pay.
We’re Your Sectional Sofa and We’re Breaking Up
We’ve worked everything out with our mediator, Coffee Table. You can sit with me, Loveseat, on weeknights and with Chaise for naps on weekends.
31 Affirmations for Quarantine
I acknowledge that I can change my sweatpants if I want to or I can wear the same ones every day forever and only I have the power to choose.
Inward Bound! Survival Skills for the Great Indoors
After completing any one of our adventures, your best self will be the one stuck inside with no one to talk to.
I’m the Cockroach That Lives Under the Sink, and This Is My MasterClass
Together, you and I shall become pioneers of pest control vexation by breaking down what I call "The Art of Infestation."
House Hunting Tips from a “Law & Order” Detective
You’re gonna want a place near bars, delis, and neighborhood laundromats. These are full of characters who will be furiously vague witnesses.
House Rules for Guests at the Cozy Cottage by the Charming Pond
We’re not real good at giving directions, so we suggest you stop by the quaint post office off Route 40 (or 14?), and ask for Hank.
An Ode to the Great Outside My Apartment
Coffee shops: “Ugh, I know it’s overpriced, but it’s my guilty pleasure!” is now what I say when I buy healthcare.