Yes, Chick-fil-A is Totally Evil—But on the Other Hand, Waffle Fries
Who could possibly resist the siren song of a factory-farmed chicken breast wedged between two nondescript slices of bread? Plus a pickle?!
Tag: Jobs
Diversity Hire Interview Questions
When did you know you were diversity? What do you know about the lack of equal opportunity at our company?
The Most Heartwarming Stories of Late Capitalism This Week
When a teen in New Mexico had trouble concentrating in class due to hunger, her teachers managed to buy her six months’ worth of Adderall! Wow!
Our New Hiring Practices at This Growing Company in a Fast-Paced Industry
Cover letters ARE required. But we will not be reading them. Never read a cover letter. This will only complicate your decision-making process.
Incomplete Drafts of My Cover Letter for a Summer Internship
Dear Joan, I looked up your name on LinkedIn---because that’s how much I care about this job. I seriously need you to hire me.
Missed Connections: Millennials and an Affordable Housing Market
“Yo, it’s me: the brand-new condo that sits on the same lot that rent-controlled housing used to be on."
Twelve New Career Ideas for Student Loan Collectors If Elizabeth Warren Becomes President
Finally, you can be the cafeteria worker whose job it is to take lunches away from elementary schoolers who forget to bring their lunch money.
Hi! I’m Calling About Your Student Loan Payments, You Fucking Deadbeat Loser!
Are able to pay today? No? That seems crazy to us, because money falls out of the sky and everybody wins the lottery at least twice a year.
“SNL” Alums Remember the Awkward Encounters with Lorne Michaels That Got Them Hired!
Seth Meyers: "Lorne and his cavalry cast a weighted net over me and dragged me away on a dirt road. I knew my life was about to change forever."
Rules for a Silicon Valley High School Dance in 2029
Students are not to ask the Steve Jobs hologram any questions pertaining to how much he actually did at Apple as opposed to the engineers.
Warnings About My Small Town From a Local Intellectual
Don't go to church on Sunday? You might as well be drinking abortions out of a fancy wine glass made of Reagan’s bones.
Never Thought I’d Say This, But I, John Wick, Would Like More Gun Control
At that point, I had covered my guns in concrete. I didn’t want them. But the game pulled me back and I ended up killing about a thousand more dudes.