Ice Cream Flavors That Accurately Represent a New York Summer
Beach Dreams Unfulfilled Tropical Cherry – A fruity favorite to remind you that you’re too funemployed to escape or go to Hawaii this summer.
Tag: Lists
Rides We Will Immediately Be Destroying at Croceworld, the Jim Croce Amusement Park
Workin' at the Car Wash Ride – Just a way we got free labor by asking parkgoers to buff all the scratches out of the Bad Bad Leroy Brown Bumper Car.
10 Steps to Having the Perfect Conference Call
Reintroduce every person to ensure there are no people "ghosts" on the call. Remember that there will, however, be actual "ghosts" on the call.
Lettuce Number the Reasons to Join Community-Supported Agriculture
Look forward to a wide variety of items in your CSA box like kale, swiss chard, baby kale, frisee, dino kale, a bunch of spiky weeds, and red kale.
Signs You’re Reading a Really Shitty Sequel to Stieg Larsson’s “Millennium” Trilogy
Instead of computer hacking, the heroine’s special skill is replicating the fruit bouquets from Edible Arrangement.
Suggested Reading for Your Not-Woke-Enough 6-Year-Old
The Little Engine That Lost Its Medicare - After losing a spoke while transporting cargo, The Little Engine is no longer able to afford repairs.
The Existential Perception of Life at 6 vs. 60 Years Old
Age 6: Has pastel-colored hair to stand out in a crowd. Age 60: Spends $10 monthly to ensure ID theft protection and anonymity.
The 10 Best Humor Websites You’ve Never Heard Of
The Naughty Muffin - Risqué humor focused on baked goods. Sample posts: "Oh my, you ARE all buttery today, aren’t you?"
NY Times Urges Unity vs. Headlines That Gloss Over Important Context
Shooter Urges Unity vs. Gun Violence | Wall Street Urges Unity vs. Income Inequality | Toddler Urges Unity vs. Temper Tantrums
10 Reasons Why Dog Owners in Seattle Made Me Hate Dogs
It’s a street fair, not a dog park. Your unpredictable canine is not having fun and neither am I. You can’t be apart for one hour? Seek therapy.
Rejected Chapter Summaries From “Stranger Things – Season 3”
The gang meets at the gym as they each try to punch the hottest boy in town. Curly Girl has a touching feminist discussion with mom about journalism.
Other Things Elizabeth Warren Has a Plan For
Paying for that improv class. Paying for single-payer healthcare. Getting back together with Jeff. Convincing Jeff to come to your improv show.