Men | Page 16 | Points in Case

Tag: Men

Lois has been distant ever since we found out my sperm could kill her. She keeps making snide comments about how Batman wouldn't have this problem.

Let’s acknowledge that I’m the only person in this company with a catchphrase. The comedic effect of “cowabunga, dude!” is enhanced by repetition.

I don’t fix my issues, but I hide them under a thin sheet of functionality that I quickly whip off with the flair of a flamboyant Las Vegas magician.

I thought space was going to be the most romantic time of our 10-month relationship. That’s why I got three new rompers and a bikini wax.

When Allisyn awakens in his bedroom filled with Reservoir Dogs posters and empty Gatorade bottles, she’s charmed. Starring Gal Gadot and Seth Rogen.

Then right on cue, the whole complex became a mashup of Duck Soup: Mrs. Tyndale burst out of her door singing what sounded like some sort of aria.

Now’s the time to fix your emotional, psychic, and spiritual energy on a single person who thinks of you as the weird and moderately asexual kid.

He spent your entire relationship lying and promising things that never came; he’ll fit right in amongst our nation's political leadership.

You don't release a fleet of driverless vehicles on a city and not expect someone to try to lasso one and wrestle it to a stop.

I am the only one in my sphere of influence who has a truck that hauls ass. As such, my friends frequently call me to haul some ass for them.

"A Room of One’s Own" by Stieg Larsson: But, you may say, we asked you to speak about women who don’t take any shit and the stories they tell

“What is it, sugar bean?” your husband said while massaging my back. Again, we’re speaking in metaphor. This can mean whatever you want it to mean!