Is My Mom Worth a $7 Birthday Card?
I love you, mom. But as I comb through CVS's cards, I wonder: Are you worth the $7 I'm forking out for glitter, cheap puns, and a 12-second clip of "La Bamba"?
Tag: Money
The Handmaid’s Tale is Especially Scary For Me Because I’m Rich and White
Offred was forced to have sex with the commander again in front of his wife. Who treats white women like that!? Ugh, it was so terrible, because that like literally is my life.
We’re Not a Regular Startup, We’re a FUN Startup
Are you trying to avoid waiting tables or working with children at all costs? Can you feign sufficient interest in digital advertising? Then read on for ArrowTek's openings!
You Won’t Need Healthcare for Long, Trust Me
No sense in paying all this money for Obamacare when the end is near. Expensive, too expensive, when we're all going to die anyway. You should love the AHCA.
Our Dissident Art Needs Continued NEA Support to Expose the Meaningless Striving of People with Regular Jobs
In-your-face artists who reject truth and beauty (but will never clean up their own mess) deserve federal support because they are more creative than you.
How I Quit My Mundane Life and Traveled the World with Nothing But a Passport, a Smile, and $47.5M in My Trust Fund
Fans are always writing me with the same question: “Liza, I’ve always wanted to travel the world and live an adventurous life like you do on your blog, but how do I do it?”
6 Venmo Requests to Send a Guy After a First Date
Amount: $40 Message: "Marketing fees associated with me blogging about this date." Rationale: He’s a weirdo, and weirdos need to be blogged about.
It Must Be Nice Having the Job Security That Comes With Acting
Compared to investment banking, my colleagues tell me acting is almost completely recession-proof. People will buy tickets to shows even if they don't have the money to buy them!
Hey Brother, Can You Spare a Billion?
Dear Mr. Trump: Years after that encounter outside Trump Tower years ago, you're now the most powerful man in the world, and I'm sitting in the same spot in my urine-soaked pants.
5 Gift Returns That Protest My Gift-Giver’s Worldview But Do Not Reflect My Enjoyment of Their Present
My uncle's Osprey Xenith 105 backpack would've been perfect, if only he hadn't decided to post "We should nuke the entire middel east!!!!" on Facebook.
The Annoying Realities of Being Robbed
However it plays out, someone will target you, steal from you, and leave you angrier than you’ve ever felt in your life.
The 9 Worst German Beers, Tested
Germany has some of the best damn beers in the world. And unfortunately I'm not drinking any of them, because I can't afford too.