To the Horror Movie Villain Who’s Definitely Not Hiding Behind My Curtains
Are you embarrassed that I called you out, and now suffer from some sort of movie monster performance anxiety?
Are you embarrassed that I called you out, and now suffer from some sort of movie monster performance anxiety?
It’s ironic that Freddy Krueger’s initials are FK because the guy should be Fucking Kancelled.
It’s funny if you sync up scenes of Danny riding his tricycle with the theme song from Naked Gun.
Their parents, who are never in town, don’t answer my emails, so parent-teacher conferences are as big a joke as life insurance in this town.
Don’t use the names of people you know, such as your husband---whose disappearance 12 years ago was a tragic accident you’re still really sad about.
As a current job seeker, I would love nothing more than to find out what exactly those thoughts are in that big, juicy brain of yours.
I'm not gonna be a cop about booze or weed or the occasional mysterious disappearance of a fellow resident.
Good News: He has a graduate degree. Bad News: It's an MFA.
“It’s not supposed to be funny,” I replied. “It’s a command.” Chad appeared confused.
Now I know some of you were disturbed by the creepy old gas station attendant who insisted on giving us his shotgun.
Boy meets girl, girl falls for boy and sacrifices everything. How are we supposed to change society if we keep glorifying these shitty images?
You think I didn’t see your ass (which was nude) swimming in Camp Crystal Lake? You know I drowned in there? That’s just disrespectful.