Freshmen (Sexual) Orientation
No matter what the rules say, it is absolutely OK to want to have sex with your orientation teacher. Plus more wisdom from a former orientation teacher!
Tag: Nick Moose’s View
Lodged in Veronica
I, like every man worth his salt, must eventually face the ultimate question. Who's it gonna be? Betty Cooper or Veronica Lodge?
Get Busy Livin’ or Get Busy Buyin’ Baked Goods
Sorry, Vanessa Hudgens, but High School Musical is going to have to make way for 'SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION BAKE SALE'!
Aye, There’s the Rub: Rabbits
A lot of people never even thought about having sex with their video game systems. But now that we have Rub Rabbits, why shouldn't my penis be in stylus?
It’s Friday Night and the Moose is Right
Just because I have less fun these days doesn’t mean you guys have to suffer, so for PIC, Friday Nights will be forever known as Nick Moose Night!
A Firm Punk-Pop Unit
The Attractive Distractions are on a mission: bring the Portage County area concise, amusing two minute girl songs at a low low price, and get laid.
Basically What We’re Gonna Do is Sex
Vanessa Hudgens' new single, "Sneaker Night," gets one male fan thinking about the grown-up message beneath the shoes: sex with Vanessa Hudgens.
Read This Column, Win Fun Prizes!
Nick Moose prides himself not only in bringing you 15% more accurate columns than anyone else, but also ridiculously unnecessary over-the-top promotional gimmicks.
Today I Celebrate My Independence… From Lindsay Lohan
Lindsay, I’ll always have fond memories of our relationships, but you’re into girls now… so I have to let you go. Even though it's hard to believe Samantha is any more a female than I am.
Nick Moose Hasn’t Been Paying Attention At All!
Nick Moose is disabled, but not like you think. He has Attention Deficit Disorder, better known as "Hey, what's that shiny thing over there?!"
Nick Moose’s Mom’s Backyard That Time Forgot
Nick Moose has discovered that he can live at home with his mom AND make money by using the backyard as a dinosaur park.
Whatever Happened to Nick Moose?
Why did Nick Moose leave the Kent Stater, and what happened to him in the meantime? Some theorists say he was Lindsay Lohan's sex slave.